Of all the unique things experienced by visitors to Mexico City, I’ve found that our US-based guests are most surprised that English is not spoken more prevalently here. I think there’s a general assumption among Americans that everyone in Mexico is dying to move to the USA and hence is furiously learning English. Point of fact, many Mexicans are perfectly happy here in Mexico! And although plenty of folks do speak English in DF, it certainly isn’t the defacto language if you venture off the 4 or 5-star hotel tourist circuit.
All of that said, the last thing I want to do is dissuade non-Spanish-speakers from taking a trip down to Mexico City! You can certainly get around DF; it may just be a bit trickier & require a bit more research in advance, depending on your travel goals.
Of course, depending on your travel goals, your best bet may be finding yourself a Spanish Wingman. This was the lesson learned with our most recent visitor– let’s call him “Mandrew” for the sake of anonymity. Mandrew is an experienced world traveler who enjoys learning about the culture of other countries, ideally as communicated through their women. Despite claims of spanish/portuguese/swedish/thai fluency, most of Mandrew’s foreign vocabulary seemed centered around greetings & ordering tasty beverages. However, his regular traveling companion (let’s call him “Mruckenmiller”) assured us that Mandrew’s efforts had never been stymied for lack of knowing a language, offering anecdotes of various Brazilians who fell victim to his portuguese-free charms.
I thought Mandrew might be stymied in the Spanish-heavy environment of Mexico City. Instead, I learned that he is a man who knows when to call on his resources.
Saturday night was bustling at Big Red in Polanco last week, so we settled in for a nite of miniscule-but-bargain-priced tequilas & beers. Late in the evening, Mandrew spotted a lovely lady mysteriously sitting alone at a table, so he made his move. Two minutes later, he was back at our table to inquire whether John would be so kind as to join him.
And so it was that John made his debut appearance as…. SPANISH WINGMAN. Experience the drama via my photos from our nearby table, slightly blurred due to my constant laughter. Although I could not hear the dialog per se, I’ve extrapolated a few quotes as I imagined them…
[Imagine various other photos of witty repartee here]
[Insert additional awkward pauses & deep eye-gazing]
Suddenly, prospects began to dim when her two guy friends showed up:
While the combination of Mandrew’s powers of seduction + John’s Spanish Wingman translations were strong to quite strong (just like Mruckenmiller’s stock portfolio), in the end the 4 of us opted to return to our apartment unaccompanied by these newfound friends. Don’t worry, readers who were rooting for Mandrew. You can rest assured that he did not sleep alone that nite.
Any single, English-only-speaking males who are planning a visit to Mexico City in the coming months, do advise if you would like to investigate engaging John’s Spanish Wingman services. Fees are negotiable & while results are not guaranteed, let’s just say– Unless the goods [aka, you] are odd, your odds are good.